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“What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the master calls a butterfly.”   Richard Bach

Just a note to say I am sorry that I haven’t been in touch for a few weeks. Some of you may or may not know that my mum passed away a few weeks ago.

She had been ill for a number of years with Dementia but it was still a huge shock when she passed as it happened all rather quickly.

I am not writing this to spread doom and gloom but just to let you know that I have learnt a few things over the past weeks that I wanted to share with you.

I don’t think I realised how much of an emotional person that I am, I could cry at the drop of a hat whilst everyone else seemed to be holding it together well. I have since realised that it isn’t a weakness to cry, we all handle situations in different ways. On the other hand just because other people are not crying that doesn’t mean that they are not feeling the pain, again it is just a different way of handling it.

You also see that friends and family support you in different ways too, some are there for you through all of it and some just stay in the background. Again that is the way that they handle it too.

I have gone through guilt amongst other emotions too. However a very wise friend told me the other day that it does me no good at all to dwell on things that cause me hurt. If I can think of good memories of mum then that is great and if I can feel blessed for having such a wonderful person who brought me into this world then that is good BUT to constantly keep reliving things in my head that only serve a purpose to make me hurt then do not do it.

So if you have ever lost someone close to you then you can probably relate to a lot of what I am saying.

The real message here is that we are all human and we feel human emotions. Sometimes it isn’t easy to think positive thoughts all the time when life throws us crap to deal with. Take some time out and feel all the emotions and grief that you need to feel and don’t hold it back – as it will probably come back to bite you on the bum at some time later in your life.

Anyway here is a picture of a beautiful butterfly. My mum got her words mixed up and called them Flutterbys. I actually prefer Flutterby to Butterfly.

FLutterby

 

Love & Light

Jackie xx

 

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